Giving Thanks #4

This is a big one. I have thanked some of you personally for this but I wanted to do a big post about it. Again. Because I can never repay the kindness that was shown to me during our toughest days. When we were sitting in that hospital sterile waiting room, I felt like I was surrounded by our friends and family. It was unbelievable watching the messages literally pouring in. People we had not spoken to in years, friends of friends, co-workers of family, complete strangers. I cannot even begin to describe how much strength it gave me.

If you were one of the lucky few who got to speak to me directly that week you were aware of the one rule I enforced. There was to be no crying. My poor mother and sister in law, did not enjoy this rule. But for me I knew if I opened that gate, it would overflow with emotion. So I didn’t cry. Not once in the PICU. It’s not to say I wasn’t emotionally torn by seeing Sawyer in this way. I was just being what he needed me to be. Crying wasn’t going to help, so I couldn’t.

Recently I went back and read every message again. Every comment on the blog, every private message, every status shout out, every comment on all the pictures and every wall post. This time I did cry. I could barely get through them. Your words all meant to much in the moment. Looking back on them, they mean even more. And I was deeply moved to see how many people wrote daily messages. It took 30 seconds out of your life, and you may not have thought about it much. But know that it did and still does, mean the world to me. I am in the process of recording all of them to put in his memory book, because I want to be able to show him how many people around the world were thinking of him.

So this is a sincere thank you to everyone who reached out to us, in every way. Thank you for helping me take on the world. I could not have done it without every single one of you. Thank You.

{To see previous Giving Thanks Project 2012 edition’s click here. One. Two. Three.}

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